Do you have trouble saying: no? Perhaps your someone who wants to avoid conflict at all cost because you dont want to hurt someones feelings.
But does that mean you end up doing things you dont want to do? Or worse end up being taken advantage of?
Well there is a simple solution, it is a way of saying no while other people still feel appreciated, respected and listened to.
Its called agreement frames and its basically 3 sentence starters that really going to help you create fantastic boundaries.
The first one is I appreciate . . . and . . .
So say a friend of yours has invited you to the moves and your too tired and you dont really want to go. You can say:
“I really appreciate the invitation to the movies, thats so sweet of you for thinking of me and I really need some time to myself because it has been so busy recently.
The second one is I respect . . . and
So say youre at work and someone is putting pressure on you to get something done really quickly. You can say:
“I respect that you want this project done straight away and in order for me to do it properly I will have it to you on Monday.
The third one is I agree . . . and
So say youre spouse wants to go for a holiday to Europe but you dont want the jetlag. You can say:
“I agree it would be fantastic to go away on a wonderful holiday and Id love to go somewhere closer, like New Caledonia, where I dont have to worry about a long plane trip and the jetlag and that way it can be even more relaxing.
So these are really magic sentence starters where you can say no, assert yourself and create boundaries where other people feel respected.